Dear reader, if you have not read anything about the Baudelaire orphans, then before you read the next sentence, you should know the following: Violet, Klaus, and Sunny are kind-hearted and clever children, but I am very sorry to say that their lives are filled with misfortunes and calamities.

All the stories about these three children are unpleasant and sorrowful - and perhaps the one you are holding in your hands right now is the worst of all. If you do not have the courage to read a book that describes a hurricane, a signal device for help, many starving leeches, quite a bit of frozen cucumber soup, a dreadful villain, and a doll named Beautiful Penny, then you will likely be filled with despair.

I will continue to document the tragic stories of the Baudelaires because that is what I do with my life. However, you must decide for yourself whether you can handle a story filled with misfortunes.