Dear reader, I am truly sorry to have to confess that reading the book you are holding will be extremely unpleasant.

This book tells the sad story of three very unfortunate children. They are the Baudelaire siblings, who although charming and intelligent, find their lives filled with woes and misfortunes.

From the very first page of the book, where the children are at the beach learning the tragic news, the disasters continue until the very last. One might say that these children attract misfortune like magnets.

Already in the first book, the one you are holding, the three siblings are faced with a greedy and repugnant man, with clothes that itch them, with a disastrous fire, with a conspiracy to lose their fortune, and with cold porridge for breakfast.

I have taken on the difficult task of recording these sorrowful stories. However, you have the choice to put the book down right now and read something else, something more enjoyable – if of course, you prefer such a thing.